Help. Hope. Healing.

How I Let Go and Let God

In the early days of recovery, it’s natural to feel a need to focus on overcoming the behavior. It seems at the time that it is the goal, the thing we’re even bothering with the process for. So, when people start with the platitude to “let go and let God,” and the jargon about “turning […]

Where Are the Nine?

At the feast that is life, some people come to the table only to eat and not to serve. Many things are there of which to partake, but no food is quite so sweet as the joy of serving. As the banquet is laid before us, we often take no thought for those who clean, […]

Going With the Flow

I finally went to college in my forties and graduated at fifty. It’s an accomplishment that I claim some pride in, since I’m the first generation in all of my lineage to get a college degree. It felt good and it has been of great value to me. Be the first to like. Like Unlike […]

How to Comment

Commenting around here requires surmounting two barriers to entry. The first, and simplest, is the technical requirements for leaving a comment. The second, and hardest, has to do with finding one’s voice and being willing to talk about the topics this website is about. Be the first to like. Like Unlike See Also Treatment and […]

Focus on Changing Our Hearts, Not Just Our Behavior

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D. Focus on Changing Our Hearts, Not Just Our Behavior Imagine that you are determined to circle the globe in a rocketship, and you could choose between two different ways of doing it. Here’s the first option: you could expend enough fuel at the outset to project yourself […]

Change the Way You Do Your Compulsive Behavior

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D. Change the Way You Do Your Compulsive Behavior We have all made commitments to abstain from tempting behavior. We have also broken such promises–promises to ourselves, promises to our loved ones, and even promises to God. Rather than asking you to promise again, “I won’t do it!” […]

Overcoming Discouragement One Day at a Time

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D. Overcoming Discouragement One Day at a Time We have no greater right to focus on ourselves when we have been struggling and doing poorly in response to temptation than we do to focus on ourselves when we have been doing well. Both are forms of pride: the […]

Interrupting Destructive Mind-Shifts

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D. Interrupting Destructive Mind-Shifts When I met Arnold, he had been working for years to overcome his compulsive sexual behavior. There had been periods of progress. Arnold would repent, get his life back on track and then abstain from addictive behavior for a period of time. Notwithstanding these […]

Cultivating a Higher Appreciation and a Deeper Desire

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D. Cultivating a Higher Appreciation and a Deeper Desire During our first counseling session, one of my clients described his vulnerability to sexual temptation this way: “I have an especially powerful appreciation for female beauty and the female body.” Be the first to like. Like Unlike See Also […]

Becoming Pure Again

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D. Becoming Pure Again Abstaining from compulsive behavior becomes easirer and easier over time. I recently completed psychotherapy with a client named Rosco after nine months of working together, and it was interesting to hear him describe how temptation’s power over him had gradually decreased throughout that period. […]