Help. Hope. Healing.

Sufficient Unto the Day

By Rex Goode


There is strong evidence that certain personalities are more prone to sexual addiction than others. One kind of personality that seems more likely to be dealing with it is the go-getter corporate superstar and those who want to be like them. I am not entirely sure why this is so and the articles I read that suggested it are out of my memory. I have a few ideas, though, based purely on my own personal biases.

It seems to me that an overly ordered life, with everything planned out far in advance, is a recipe for getting caught up in the trap of sexual addiction. Day planners can become like bars on a cage and it is unnatural for humans to live in a cage. We want freedom.

When we hold ourselves too tight, with a little relaxing of the grip, we burst out in all sorts of directions. It’s like trying to squeeze wet clay in  your fist. Put enough pressure on it and it will have no choice but to squirt out through your fingers and fall on the ground.

I think that overly planning our lives out is a form of acting in. It may result in increased acting out. I think of it as being a busy-holic. Just like other forms of addiction, its purpose is to keep a person from feelings his feelings, to regulate his anxiety.

While it is essential that we be organized, we must never neglect to plan spontaneity into our lives. Spontaneity is irresistible. It will happen. The question is, “Who will decide what I do spontaneously in my life?”

If you don’t make some provision for being spontaneous, then whatever addiction you battle will decide what you do. If, on the other hand, you adopt the attitude that, “I’m not going to worry so much about tomorrow. I’ve got plenty to worry about today. I need to make some time to do something really healthy for my physical and spiritual hearts.”

If you truly must plan things in great detail, put in your plan to spend some time each day to learn how to connect with your own emotions. The key is to connect to your current and present emotions. Don’t dwell on how you felt earlier unless you are still feeling it. Being aware of your own feelings is the surest way to avoid acting out, since acting out is usually done in somewhat of a preoccupied trance.

If you know and admit that you are experiencing anxiety, you’ll be more ready to deal with it appropriately. As you get better and better and recognizing feelings in the moment you begin to feel them, life will get a lot more sane.

When you write down an appointment for the future, let it go. If you need to prepare for it, do it today and then let it go. Jesus’ closing advice in the sermon on the mount was this:

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof (Matthew 6:34).

Plan for tomorrow, but live today.

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