Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D.

Becoming Pure Again

Abstaining from compulsive behavior becomes easirer and easier over time. I recently completed psychotherapy with a client named Rosco after nine months of working together, and it was interesting to hear him describe how temptation’s power over him had gradually decreased throughout that period. In some ways, the spiritual healing from sexual indulgences is akin to waiting for the body to metabolize a dangerous drug we have ingested. The chemical has a certain half-life, and it is only gradually, over an extended period of time that the toxic substance is purged from the system. When we first abstain from viewing and fantasizing about powerful sexual images, it may seem as though we will forever be bombarded by mental pictures and desires that threaten to pull us back into full-fledged indulgence. However, if we are patient and willing to delay gratification, we will eventually experience the increasing freedom that Rosco discovered as he persisted in his abstinence. (more…)

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D.

Accepting God’s Love for Us

In the addiction treatment groups I facilitate, group members have the opportunity to “check in” at the beginning of each session, assessing and describing how they’re doing emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Listening to our clients evaluate their spirituality, I have been struck by the emphasis on their performance. “I’m not doing very well spiritually,” I hear almost every session from at least one group member, “I haven’t studied my scriptures or prayed like I should have this week.” (more…)

Commenting around here requires surmounting two barriers to entry. The first, and simplest, is the technical requirements for leaving a comment. The second, and hardest, has to do with finding one’s voice and being willing to talk about the topics this website is about. (more…)

Coming to LDSR is something usually done in a mixture of sadness and hope. The sadness usually comes from yet another experience where we thought we had our sexual behavior under control, but didn’t. The hope is that an LDS oriented environment will be the trick that will make this time different, that this time will be the time that will work. Perhaps there is even some magical thinking involved – just coming to this website will miraculously heal us right away, and we can be all better from now on until forever. We want to find useful ideas and support from people who have been where we are and who know the secrets to recovery, sobriety, and maybe even cure.

Some of those things are possible, and some of them aren’t. The purpose of this article is to help you get the most value from the resources on LDSR you can. (more…)

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D.

Glimpsing Our True Nature

The apostle Paul reminded us that, “For now, we see through a glass, darkly. . . .” (1 Corinthians 13:12). In my work, I have wondered whether our view as mortals is ever more dim than when we turn to look at ourselves. When our view of our own nature is clouded, when we are blinded temporarily to our divine potential and our inestimable worth in God’s eyes, imagine what an opportunity that is for Satan. After all, when we do not value ourselves, we lose completely the motivation to control ourselves. (more…)

A few years ago, we compiled some advice from some of our subscribers. Here it is.

The road to recovery is fraught with difficulties, sometimes of our own making. Some of our participants here at LDSR have identified some of the pitfalls they have encountered. (more…)

Used by permission

I am the son of a Seminary teacher. My father, the Seminary teacher, beat his wife and children. I am the oldest of seven other siblings; therefore a total of eight children. I was introduced to pornography at a very young age. I remember finding crime magazines in my dad.s closet that usually had a picture of a woman in distress. I was not very interested in this type of stuff as the atmosphere in our home was one of constant fear. (more…)

Sex Addiction Recovery Tips from Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D.

Identifying Your Primary Compulsive Cycle

Bart was a successful investment broker and entrepreneur who came in to get help because he was having a more and more difficult time resisting his sexual impulses. As sexual sin became more compelling to Bart, he worked harder than ever to stay busy and productive, hoping that he could distract his thoughts from the temptation that seemed to take center stage so readily now. He discovered, however, that even his extra efforts failed him, and that in fact the pull toward evil seemed to swell in proportion to the energy he exerted to fight it. As a result, he decided to seek counseling. He didn’t understand how most of his life could be so productive–close to perfect, he thought–while this one part seemed to spiral further out of control the harder he worked to correct the problem. (more…)

I was raised in an active LDS family. I am the oldest of seven kids. I have four brothers and two sisters. I never noticed any deficiencies with my parents while growing up. Only recently have I noticed a possible deficiency with my father. He was recently diagnosed as ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). My mother would describe as being easily distracted and somewhat aloof for about as long as she has known him. He’s loving and caring, but I see now that he is not always able to express it. Through no fault of his or mine, his condition may have been a factor in my youth. (more…)

One of the features of a sexual addiction, and probably any addiction, is difficulty with clear thinking. When addiction reigns, thoughts are unpredictable and often not grounded in truth. That is one of the reasons that the twelve steps refer to restoring a person to sanity. (more…)